Friday, July 11, 2008

Circa Feb O8


It ended 2 mths ago. Never were official, but a title couldn't have made it more real. It was 'love'. Days turned into nights and into days again. Showed up and didnt leave for 2 days. Only time apart was work. All was given. Cooked, cleaned, played the wifey role. Problem was, nobody played the husband role. Just enuff was given to suffice. There were qualities about him absolutely loved. Some hated. Let the friends tell it, that's just the way he was. the way he ROLLED. Clothes, toothbrush, phone charger, razor, body wash. all strategically placed. A week in jail. Who was there. In court with his mom. Surprised him when me, not SHE was in the front row. Broke my heart to see him like that. Cleaned his house, made him dinner, awaited his return. Then it turned bad. calls ignored, texts unanswered, he wasnt the same, WE wasnt the same. Back off. Give space, time . . . Just enuff to reel me back in. Stayed wit it for 4 more months. tried, and triedand cried. Put up with that bullshit lil drama wit the ex. Showed him what a REAL woman was like. No appreciation. "He's skanless." "He's no good" "Dont fall for the game" 4 months of BULLSHIT!!! Until that nite. "
"Sometimes some lies can take a minute to fully realizeHis tears your eyes30 seconds to apoligizeYou give him one more chancejust like the time beforebut he already knows you'd give a hundred moreuntil that night in bed, you wake up in a sweatYour racing to the doorCan't take it anymore"
Realization smacked in the face!
Made it so hard. 2 AM. He screamed. I stayed. Snatched my keys, my fone. Sleep. 2 PM. Slipped out the door never to turn back around. My soul has returned so I call it a lesson learned. You oughta see me now. . . . Love wasn't love. Respect was minimal. Neccesity was one sided until the realization i was gone. Want me back? Can't have this back. I'm a D!V@!!! Gave u a 2nd chance n u played me twice. Friendship is valued. Never forget the gr8 times we've shared. It was deeper then most knew but More shallow then I realized. I know now. Let the next chick deal wit you. better yet, let the last one deal wit you.

Never give your heart to someone who has another's heart.
Never love out of pity.
Never fall too hard too fast
Never snoop unless you wanna find sumthing.
Never jump to conclusions.
Never integrate families.
Always listen to your heart.
Always makes friends with their friends.
Always listen to said friends.
NEVER DOUBT YOURSELF!!! If you KNOW you're a Queen/King & should be treated as such, never settle for less.
Never engage yourself with the ex (shit gets messy. You'll be more worried with pissing him/her off that u lose sight of the prize. or forget that theres no prize at all)
Never treat a NIGGA like a King.
Never let them talk you into staying. ever. under any circumstances. GET GONE & STAY GONE!!!
Been gone. PEACE!

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